Greg Giraldo -- Midlife Vices

As soon as I heard that the guy graduated from Harvard Law School, Giraldo and his Caroline's routines went straight from "kinda sorta funny" to "side-splitting and profound" in a New York minute.

I guess if I'm infused with juridical reverence like that I oughta register for the LSAT pronto.

Massacre in Dinosaur Valley

Finally, a cannibal flick suitable for yer Bad Movie party! Maybe that's 'cause Massacre in Dinosaur Valley ain't really a cannibal picture. See, no matter how much the trailer emphasizes terror, loincloths, and screamin' naked ladies, the actual flick's more Andy Sidaris doing Romancing the Stone than Herschell Gordon Lewis doing culturally insensitive. Still okay, but be forewarned!

District 9

Huh, a new release? For the Highland Cinema? I know how strange that must seem to you all, but I figured that once I got one o' them fancy big-screens and wired some classy speakers into my Nixon-era hi-fi, I owed it to myself to fire up an honest-to-goodness blockbuster and let my neighbors know that I mean business. Turns out, this particular box office stunner was super cool! I'm not lying when I say I District 9 was really great, what with all its deep-space sea-creature aliens, non-stop nausea-cam, and frequent gloppy, sloppy, tinnitus-inducing explosions. But my favorite part, you ask? The obvious socio-political overtones! They somehow managed to avoid bein' preachy, overbearing, or condescending and I'm still trying to figure out how they pulled it off. Some feat.

The Bicycle Thief

My first foray into Italian Neo-realism. I finally understand that scene in Precious!

Demons

And in one fell swoop, Lamberto Bava brought giallo horror to the Less Than Zero set.